~ written by Connie Dunmyer
Growing up, if I heard it once, I heard it a million times... "Close the door. Were you born in a barn?" Usually the culprit wasn't me. I've always been a bit picky about closing doors. I don't like the bugs an open door allows. And most of all, I am terrified of letting in a mouse.
Life carries with it a ton of ups and downs. And it doesn’t matter if we’ve lived a long time or a short time. (I learned that truth at Ronald McDonald House.) Sometimes people hurt us. Another truth. But when given the choice, I think we almost kind of prefer that people hurt us because then we have a target – someone to blame.
But what about when there’s no one else to blame? When it’s MY bad decision… When I am the one who caused the problem or failed in some way. Or perhaps it’s a health problem. Maybe it’s a hurricane or a flood. Perhaps the death of a loved one.
We all have a past filled with painful things. And even though we’d generally like to keep the past in the past, we often find that the past keeps creeping back into our present days.
I’ve written about how there have been times in my life where I thought God was doing one thing, only to find out He was doing something quite different – and it was more painful. And so recently I was convinced that God was probably going to do “that same thing” again. Thus, I became saddened and even tormented by that thought.
BUT GOD… sent me this passage from Anne Graham Lotz. It has meant a great deal to me, and changed my perspective:
If you and I are going to be strong in our walk with the Lord we have to close the gate on the past -- past memories... past failures... past ways of doing things... past comparisons.
What is there in your past that keeps you looking over your shoulder? Was it a failure? Has it just been that in the past you've been wandering in the wilderness? You have to close the gate on that. Are you hesitating because you're not sure that shutting the gate on the past is possible, or that it's worth it? Are you wondering what you will get out of it?
Then let me share what I've gotten out of closing the gate on the past and embracing all God has for me in the present and for the future:
- A deep joy that doesn't depend on my circumstances.
- A peace that passes all understanding and overcomes all misunderstandings.
- A release from resentment and bitterness and unforgiveness that can mire me down in a vengeful attitude.
- Freedom to love people who have been unlovely, abusive or unkind.
- An anticipation of the blessings God has for me. Confident that they will be greater than anything I could have grabbed for myself and expectancy that the best is yet to come.
- And the confident hope that one day I will not only shut the gate to the past but I'll walk through the pearly gates into my heavenly home. Gates that have been flung wide open for me by Jesus - the ultimate Savior and Deliverer.
You and I can't go forward by looking in the rearview mirror. It's time to shut the gate on the past look ahead and embrace all the God has for you.
As I read it for the first time, God highlighted my being fearful of misunderstanding what God is doing now.
And FYI: Fear is not Trust.
All I could see was God doing the very thing I did not want to happen.
All I could see was the fear.
BUT – I needed to close the door on that fear. I didn’t know how – but I prayed for the Spirit to enlighten me, help me, guide me, show me, or do it for me. It didn’t happen all at once. And frankly, every so often, a tentacle of that very fear will reach through the doorway and wave at me… yes, a lot like The Shining. . . "Heeeere's Johnny!"
I remind myself that what happened to me before ended up completely for my good. It took a long time for me to see that. But I do see and believe it now fully. Even so, that doesn’t mean that episode is a pattern for my life. God is my good Father, Who only does what’s BEST for me. Not second best. Not third. Not hum-drum. Not only what feels good at the time. And certainly not a horror-flick. But only what’s BEST!
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
So then and now I pray to my good Father. I give up my fear. I close the gate, I shut the door, on that past experience. And in the Name of Jesus, I bolt that door closed by binding the evil forces away from me that are tempting me to sin: to fear what God is doing. I pray that the Spirit with fill me to overflowing… water to wine… that I may be completely and utterly at rest and peace in Him, as I trust Him DAILY.
My need is real.
And timing is real.
But God is never late.
And God is ALWAYS Good!
Life is rarely what we expect. I know the little girl in the pink-flowered-canopy-bed some 60 years ago never could’ve imagined this life. And if I am in awe of what God can do in THIS life… Oh just imagine the awe and amazement and excitement and joy when what is present becomes past… and I close the door on this life, and walk… nay, RUN through the next door, the final door, that God has prepared for me!
To trust God with my Eternity means I need to trust Him with my Now.
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© 2026: Connie F. Dunmyer, All Rights Reserved.