~ written by Connie Dunmyer
WHO do I pray to?
Do I pray to a heavenly “Santa Claus”? Do I pray to my own mind and wishful thoughts? Do I pray to “anyone out there” who may be listening? Do I know to Whom I pray? Do I pray to the Creator and Re-creator of life?
WHAT do I pray for?
Do I pray to get my OWN will? Do I pray for stuff? Do I pray for self and selfish reasons? Do I pray for others and their needs? Do I listen to hear from God what I should pray so I don’t pray amiss?
WHERE do I pray?
Do I pray only when I’m at church? Do I pray at my child’s bedside? Do I pray at my bedside? Do I pray in my office? Do I pray in the car? Do I pray when I’m with other people?
WHEN do I pray?
Do I pray AFTER I’ve done everything I can do on my own? Do I pray ONLY when the situation is out of my control? Do I ever pray when I’m happy? Do I pray unceasingly?
WHY do I pray?
Do I pray because I have no OTHER ideas or choices? Do I pray because I want to vent or cry or complain? Do I pray because I want to be closer to the Father? Do I pray because I know this is how God works in my life?
HOW do I pray?
Do I pray kneeling? Do I pray while standing? Do I pray in a fetal position? Do I pray aloud? Do I “think” my prayers? Do I pray in faith? Do I pray in fear? Do I pray mindlessly? Do I meditate on Who God is? Do I pray with thanksgiving?
Recently I was with a loved one who was suffering. There was nothing I could do to fix the situation, despite my best efforts. As I drove away, I felt a wave of guilt. I was crying out to God. And I asked Him what I should do. I asked if I was doing something wrong. Perhaps I had missed something. I went back and forth between asking and complaining.
It wasn’t audible, but I swear what I heard from the Holy Spirit in my heart was this:
“What would you do if you weren’t actually here? If you were home?”
I said, “Well, that’s easy. I would pray and I would trust that You would take care of this situation.”
BINGO! THAT’S IT!!
Why is it that if I am present, I assume that I must DO something to FIX the situation? Why do I use my own means before I lay the need before the One Who knows what to do, AND has the power to do so? And ultimately, why do I "choose" fear and confusion over the peace that passes all understanding?
Note the two key words: Pray and Trust.
I think I’m pretty good at the first word – Pray. Although sometimes my prayers are more like a "Festivus airing of grievances" than requests to the Holy God and Creator of the Universe. Still, I think over the years I have learned that prayer is truly the only thing that works in this life. And so I have endeavored to learn how to pray effectively and without ceasing. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.
The second word is the harder part, isn’t it? Trust. We humans are born with an innate need to “control” our circumstances… our sphere of influence… our lives. Our brains convince us that with enough logic and facts, we can find a solution to any problem.
But is that what God is calling me to? Is God calling me into relationship with Him so that I can control my own destiny… so that I can have all the answers… so that I can be in charge?
I dare say, no – that is not His plan.
Psalm 127:1-2 "Unless the Lord builds the house, the builders labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the guards stand watch in vain. In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat — for he grants sleep to those he loves."
Because no matter how smart I am, no matter my education, my street-smarts, my logic… I am not God. I am not in charge. I cannot control my destiny. I cannot fix everything – for myself or others. I cannot do everything. And I cannot be all things to all people.
BUT… I know Who is and Who can and Who does!
So it begs the question, why is that word – trust – so difficult?
My theory is it’s because it removes ME from the equation. Period. Which means its root is actually "pride".
So even though I pray and I want God to answer – even though I seek Him and keep my eyes open to His deliverance – I can find myself having difficulties in actually TRUSTING Him.
There have been days when my trust-level gets pretty low. When I’m at my weakest emotionally, or physically, trust can be difficult to locate. But in recent years I’ve learned that I cannot “work up” trust. It’s not something I can conjure or do on my own. Like salvation, like faith, like love, trust is gifted to us by the Holy Spirit. (Colossians 2:6-7) I cannot package it up and gift it to God. Rather, I must lean on the Holy Spirit completely and plead with Him to help me lift that person, that need, that prayer – up to the Father and trust Him with it entirely.
There are days when I am tempted to take back that prayer – try to answer it on my own. Human nature. But what if, instead, I prayed and asked the Holy Spirit to give me the strength to NOT take it back, but to trust a bit longer. What if I prayed that prayer multiple times a day? Wouldn't my “trust-muscles” be stretched and trained and built by practicing that effort in trust?
1 Peter 5:7 “Cast all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.”
Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
I am a physical pray’er. When I pray, I tend to raise my hands and arms. For me this is an outward manifestation of what I am doing internally – I am lifting my prayer, my need, my friend, my family, my fear – lifting it... and yes, gifting it... to the Father.
Oh what great love of the Father Who WANTS my problems as a gift, and can be trusted with it!
Ah yes – but the problem-gift is not the end. For when He takes my quite imperfect problem – and when I trust it to Him – He touches and REDEEMS that problem and turns it into something beautiful. Something I never could’ve dreamed of doing. Something beyond humanity. Something holy.
Isaiah 61:1-3 “He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the blind, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion — to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”
Psalm 30:11 “You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy.”
He Doeth All Things Well – Hymn by Eliza E. Hewitt
Keep trusting in the Saviour; His blessed words recall,
“Lo, I am with you always,” Whatever ills befall;
Remember all His goodness With gratitude to tell,
And whisper for thy comfort, “He doeth all things well.”
Refrain:
Keep trusting in the Saviour; His love O who can tell?
O give Him praise and glory, “He doeth all things well.”
So I pray. And I trust. I lift my hands to heaven, and I gift the Father with the deepest heartaches of my heart and of others. And I trust… I know… that He Who does ALL THINGS well, will do so even now. For whether I am present or not - the Father most definitely is. That's it!! Oh how glorious that knowledge!
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© 2026: Connie F. Dunmyer, All Rights Reserved.